First off I just want to say sorry to all my loyal fans that check my website everyday I know it’s been a long time since I wrote a blog entry. So many things have happened to me in the past months and I think everything that went on happened for a reason and I am truly blessed to have had the opportunities. In this blog entry I will talk about everything that went on its been stressful, very tough, and frustrating, but through all that I still stayed positive and had great people around me motivating me and encouraging me I thank my family and friends for that.

After being released in Washington I was down and confused because I felt I did everything they wanted me to do, but I'm involved in a crazy business and I have grown to understand it. It was a crazy day because the day before there was rumors of a big trade that was going to happen the next day. I knew some players was going to be moved so coming to the gym early the next morning players talked in the locker room about the trade and my first thought was wow!! That could hurt me because we have another pg and at the time I thought Gilbert was coming back for sure even though we were struggling. So moments later after I lifted weights I went down to the court and began talking to some of the players about the trade and all of a sudden management came down and said can we talk to you and in this business I already know what that mean. As soon as I walked in the room the GM Ernie Grunfeld said, "Sorry Dee but we have to let you go, it became a numbers game, you have done everything we have asked and done a great job, but we had to make some moves". Man, when I tell you my heart was beating so hard and fast I made mixed feelings. I was grateful for the opportunity so I just said thank you and thank you again for the opportunity. I couldn't help it I had to let some tears drop because I have never experience something like this especially when you work so hard everyday and go hard never taking days off no matter what. Then I immediately call my agent and told him the news that was surprising to us but again this is the business I'm involved in. I packed my stuff and said bye to all the great people within the organization. Washington Wizards have a great organization and the people are great within it. So I want to thank everyone who helps me out with anything I needed. I have good relationships with some of the players and I will always remember how much love they showed me. I had great people outside of basketball in DC too and I know that’s a place I can go and be greeted with open arms. I left a positive mark out there and really happy I was able to live on the east coast in the nation capital. Now I had so many thoughts on my mind because I had a year lease on my condo, I didn't have a job anymore, I had my car, clothes, furniture to move and I didn't see none of this coming. I stayed in DC for 2 weeks working out, packing my stuff, watching a lot of film, and hanging out with my friends that I have met out there. I loved it out there, the people, the living conditions, and the city. It was a great experience for me. I was able to start 14 games, start in my home city Chicago, and I had worked my way to a two year deal after being overseas so I'm very grateful but never satisfied I want more and more because I know I can play in the NBA and play the game of basketball. So after 2 weeks there was no word of another job so I just shipped my clothes, car back to Chicago. I was happy to go back home and be with my family but I didn't want to go back like that meaning without a job you know. But I had to be around good people who really love me and understand me and what I want to accomplish. I love basketball too much to give up and not continue to follow my dreams.

So I went home and start working out with my guys and family back at my high school. I had some news from a team in the NBA but I kept it a secret because I didn't want to tell everyone I was going here and it wasn't true or official. I just took that to the gym with me and worked so hard because I still had confident and knew I am talented and work too hard to be at home with no job. So I finally got the call that I was going to Phoenix for a one day workout with 5 other point guards for a contract with the Phoenix Suns. I was so excited because my agent told me the names of the Point Guards and I am a competitor so I love working and playing against the best. Darrell Armstrong, Damon Stoudamire, Eddie Gill, Troy Hudson, and myself all competing for one job. I only packed for one day because you never know in this business plus my agent said, "They were looking at a more veteran point guard". My mom and brother said I should pack more you should be thinking you not coming back but that’s just me I think positive but I keep it real at all times. As soon as I got out there I checked into the hotel and went straight to the weight room and worked out. I did 20 minutes on the treadmill and did an upper body workout. I was so motivated and excited about the opportunity because I have always wanted to play for the Phoenix Suns because I just loved the style of play and the location. The next morning I went to the gym early so I could shoot some extra shots. I was so ready for the workout. I work out lasted hour and a half. We worked out in front of the front office, coaching staff, and Shaq O'Neal. We played 1 on 1, 3 on 3 and shot a lot of shots. I played hard and really shot the ball well. After the workout my agent called me and asked me how it went. I said I did good. I really just played my game played hard and really shot well but everyone had a good workout. So as we walking out to get into the van to head back to the airport, management grabbed me and said we are keeping you and I really can't explain the feeling. I was so happy and grateful for another opportunity to play in the league with a great team and organization. I took my physical the next day and went to watch them practice. I knew a few players on the team already, like Amare Stoudamire but my guy since we was 14, Alando Tucker who played against me since we were in high school and in college. The team was great everyone was cool and very humble. It was a great atmosphere and I really thought it was a great fit for me because I play that style of basketball. Coach Porter likes guards who could defend and that’s one of my strengths. I played in two games in which Steve Nash went down with back pains. I don't wish injury upon anyone, but this was my opportunity to play good minutes. I think I played decent but well enough. I ran the team, played good defense, and kept team organized on both ends. After just a few weeks, I came home from a long tough practice where I played really well and worked hard to only wake up to several missed calls from Steve Kerr, general manager and my agent Henry Thomas. So I quickly called my agent like whets up...I just heard it in his voice like man, "They have to release you". You have done everything they asked, worked hard; you have been a good professional, all these good things but the same results. He told me Steve Kerr wanted to talk to me and after talking to him I understood the business that much more. It’s a recession here in America and its affecting every business. It was more of a business decision. I was really getting comfortable out there and I really enjoyed playing with and against one of the greatest point guards ever in Steve Nash. Again this is the business I'm in and understand it but I really feel like I’m an NBA player.

So the next day I found myself packing and shipping my stuff back to Chicago. But real talk the only thing that’s tough about this process is the phone call home to my mom that sucks for real, because she is my biggest fan and know how much I love basketball and she know how hard I have work and work to make my dreams come true. But again at the end of the day she understands the business and understands that things could be a lot worse. She knows I'm healthy, I'm still motivated, and I will never stop working hard. I went back to going up to my high school every night playing for 2 hours and working on my game and staying in shape because it was possible I could go back to Phoenix in 10 days or another job could come along. I went hard for 2 weeks everyday praying, waiting patiently, and working hard. I was able to chill with my sons, my family, and be a witness of the crazy Chicago winter weather. Then I was asked by my agent would I go back overseas considering that the NBA Developmental league wanted me to join, there was a chance I could get a 10 day with NBA team but that wasn't for sure. I said yeah I would go back if the team is good, location is good and it benefits my career. There was some many rumors going around in Europe but I knew the teams I wanted to target and go to. I was blessed to get an opportunity to play for Maccabi. I told the fam I was going to Israel for 4 months and join one of the best teams in Europe. The competition over here is great, so many great players are here and I will be able to play and get better. One thing people have to understand is I play basketball for a living that right there is a blessing, of course I want to be in the NBA but things happen and everything happens for a reason. I have to continue to work, believe, and stay focus on my dreams. I have been down and stressed more than ever before, I mean I have never been down like this real talk I love life, but I kept a smile on my face, I still talk positive and love what I'm doing for me and my family. I think God for blessing me and making me the person I am. I thank him for my wonderful family, wonderful fans and friends. So many people want me to fail and not be successful whether you believe me or not but every time people see me they will see me doing well, happy, blessed, and doing something that I love and I'm always positive. That's why it was hard to go home and people see you like what you doing now Dee...I tell them I still play basketball and working hard to get another job. I will never stop doing me, I will never stop working and competing that’s what I do and that’s what people know me for. I feel like every person has their path in life, I think I'm going down mine. I'm still young; I think I'm just one of those players who have to take another route to get where I want to go. There's not too many players built like that, I just use everything that happened to me as motivation and fuel for my tank.

I signed the deal with Maccabi yesterday, and I left today, yeah I know things definitely move fast. I was ready for the move though. Shipping my clothes from one place to another was easy because my stuff was packed already. I wasn't ready for that 12 hour flight but that’s all part of the transition. I was updated and briefed on situation here in Israel. Playing for Maccabi comes with a lot of responsibility and pressure. After stories I could only imagine how big this move was for me. Last year when I got off the plane I was greeted by people from the media, fans but playing for Maccabi I compare it to the Lakers in the NBA. Great organization, great fans, and very successful team here in Europe. I was greeted by tons of media, flashing cameras and great fans. I was so tired because I didn't really sleep on the plane I just watched movies and listened to my new IPOD. I think I was so excited about the new job and opportunity that’s all I thought about. The airlines missed place my bags so it took forever to get them, but I was able to get my bags and head to my new place. I really like where I live its very nice and as soon as I got settled I went straight to sleep. The time difference really makes a difference for real. My body will get use to it real quick because I will be playing soon.

I just want to thank my family and friends for the support and love means a lot to me. Y'all keep me going and smiling all the time its great to have great people in your corner and I will continue to work and represent. I also want to thank my fans for the support and believing in me and my talents. I'm so sorry for not updating you and keeping up with my blog entry, I really take pride in keeping you posted and want all my fans to know what’s going on with me, directly from me not just reading on the internet or papers because I know the truth and story behind what's happening with me. I love y'all so much and know that I'm smiling, I'm positive, I'm always working hard and representing my CITY, my Schools Proviso East/U of I, and my FAMILY. I will do a better job of letting everyone know what’s going on over here. I was down, I was stressed, I was frustrated but through all of that I was breathing. I am healthy and working hard because that’s what tough, positive people do. EVERYONE goes through struggle and pain but only the strong ones get through them. Thanks for taking time to read this blog. I will have a follow up to this blog because there are more details and stories I would love to share because I want my fans to get the full experience and understanding of me as a person and player.

Quote of the day: "Those who work get what they deserve and those who believe never gives up on their dream".

Much love and respect your boy


Dee Brown "Illini Prince"
One Man Fastbreak